Thoughts on future robotics/The return of Neproxis

I can't wait till neurosurgery and robotics have advanced sufficiently to allow you to put your brain inside a robot. I for one definitely plan to become a cyborg when I get old.

I don't want one of the standard human style bodies though, maybe at first. Hmmm, maybe just start by replacing more and more body parts with robotic parts? Or go for a plug and play model which can be customised? Man, it's not going to be for years and years but the choices are already so hard!

I mean you want legs yeah, obviously legs are fine, but what if you're walking down the street, going somewhere with your robot legs, having a good time when suddenly some guy glides past you with rocket booster legs? I want those!
Or maybe someone with telescopic legs, stepping easily over obstructions? Or a tripod man? Hmmm no wait, tripod man couldn't have sex...

Do you think the cyborg men would have cocks? I mean, ok I want my brain and cock put into/ grafted onto a robot body. In that order.
Unless science has invented something better than sex, in that case I want to do that.

Think of the possibilities of arms, your left one could have a swiss army hand, each finger has a different function, psychokinetic suppressor, laser, ultranet interface, mood ray, corkscrew.
If you flip back the panel in your palm you can see the fusion reactor.

Do you think they'll have to install extra safety features once people start accidentally bringing down airplanes when using their laser finger to light cigarettes? Do you think people will continue shining the lasers into footballers eyes to put them off?
Maybe that's why we're all going to wear reflective clothing, shit, they'll have to ban mirrorballs in clubs.

What if you had a tentacle hand like Dr Octopus? That would be pretty cool. They could install beams to connect buildings in cities and you'd swing your way to work. Could be a hazard to flying cars though.
I think I'd like a ridiculously excessively unhuman arm though, it's massive steel bulk gleaming with malevolence, dirt and grime and traces of things you try not to think about. It would be disproportianitly large, like the sword of a character in a Final Fantasy game.
I would act nice and pleasant at all time, as if unaware of the horrific tool of death fused with my shoulder, the mini jets which support it complaining and sputtering, and if people pointed it out to me I would be surprised and apologetic.

"Oh this? well.. you know to be honest I forget about it, tell you the truth I can't even remember how I acquired it, isn't that funny."

Gentle chuckles all round, people holding cocktail glasses move closer.

"Careful there young lady, wouldn't want to get oil on your dress, haha. No, it is an ugly old thing isn't it, oh watch out!"

The growing crowd step back and gasp as a mushroom of dirty fire belches fort from somewhere inside the engine of the arm.

"Ha yes it does that every week or so, toxic build up you know, here."

Pressing one of the evil red buttons on the side causes the arm to emit a pleasant pale blue cloud.

"There, that's better, a pleasant scent isn't it."

"Quite! Tell me Mr Tenental, what is it? It seems to be, haha, it, ah... it's making, ha, things seem funnier."

"Yes, it does have that affect. My brain has been hardwired to resist it of course. Ah, everyone else has had too much."

The sound of bodies gently hitting the floor surrounds us.

"But not you, Diminisher. You're mind is made of sterner stuff, however you should soon find yourself unable to control it. And you're already unable to access the powers it grants you"

"Diminisher? Mr Tenental, I'm not sure what you-"

"Drop the charade Diminisher, I've been looking for you since Cylon IV. Surprised? Thought you were the only person left who new about what you did there?"

"But, haha, hahahahahahahahaha... no one lived, I would know if you were there. Mr Tenental you can't have been."

"Heh, don't you realise it's not Mr Tenental you're talking too."

The Diminisher peers through the fog, sees my unconscious body is hanging limply from the arms side.

No, you haha ha, Neproxis, haha you- hahahahah"

"Yes I survived the explosion. Tell me, how long did you agonize over the decision Diminisher? One of earths greatest heros, founding member of the infinites, destroying an entire planet? Wiping out an entire culture, thousands of species, all to stop one machine. How does it feel to know you failed? To know the cost of failing to destroy Neproxis

"HahahahahA!OW, arghhhhhe hah-"

And with that the arm of Neproxis drops the hero's remains, detatches itself from my body and, blasting a hole through the roof, flys away through the clouds.

The future's going to be fun.